Do you remember how difficult it could be when you were a child to learn the concept of sharing with your brothers and sisters? Even though the incredible importance of thinking about others’ feelings, and also being fair, was impressed upon us at an early age, it may still be a challenge to lessen sibling squabbles regarding difficult decisions we have to deal with in adulthood – such as just how to fairly divide caregiving costs for our aging parents.
Gregory French, president-elect of the National Academy of Elder Law Attorneys, points out, “What a family member considers ‘fair’ is very much dictated from that family member’s perspective…there’s a lot of family baggage that comes out, like: ‘Mom paid for your MBA, and she didn’t do that for me.’”
These guidelines can help individuals and their families achieve an understanding on the most reasonable division of caregiving costs for a senior loved one:
- Enlist assistance from a mediator. Sitting down with the help of a reputable third party professional, such as an attorney or financial planner with a specialty in elder issues, could go a long way towards trying to keep the discussion on track and advancing to the very best resolution.
- Take into account hands-on caregiving assistance vs. expenses. Splitting up care reasonably should include a chat on the length of time each sibling can devote to supplying care in the home, and how much financial care can be offered. For example, a sibling dwelling in close proximity to the senior may donate more time but less financial help in comparison to somebody who resides in another state.
- Document the discussion. Putting everything in writing ensures that everyone is on the same page, and allows the possibility to go back and review what was decided upon later if a dispute should occur.
And first and foremost, agree to set aside any lingering childhood dynamics in order to really come together to provide the highest quality of care and attention possible.
Independence-4-Seniors Home Care of DuPage County and the surrounding suburbs helps families have a healthy life balance with the professional in-home care services for seniors that provide families with a secure feeling in realizing their aging loved one is in the best of hands. Working with Independence-4-Seniors Home Care also means that individuals and their families can spend even more quality time together, while our fully trained and knowledgeable caregivers assist with a few of the more everyday aspects of care, such as cleaning, doing the laundry, food preparation, running errands like shopping for groceries and picking up prescriptions, and much more. Call us at (630) 323-4665 for details.